Home Page Design and the Blindfolded Cheese Salesman - tip #3

In my last tip to the blindfolded cheese salesman, I suggested that new visitors should be shown one type of content, return visitors another. Nope - this wasn't a goof on my part but a very clever segue into tip #3.

You see, our blindfolded cheese salesman, Joe, knows who his return visitors are, because he gives everyone he meets a very stylish cow bell to hang around their necks.

As someone approaches, he listens for the cowbell. If he doesn't hear it, he pulls out his generic sample platter and launches into his opening introduction, "Hi, my name's Joe. I'm your one-stop source for all information and products related to cheese."

If he hears the cowbell, he calls out, "Hi, good to see you again." And what makes Joe a very good cheese salesman is that he can differentiate the clang of each of the cowbells he hands out. The soft thudding bell went to the lady who was interested in cheese history and cheese making techniques. Get more of that info out and ready to show her, and remind her about a new book on cheese recipes. The hard clanging bell went to the gentleman who loved soft runny cheeses. Pull out some crackers and runny cheese samples tailored to his preferences.

The cowbell technique employed by our blindfolded cheese salesman isn't foolproof. People can lose or purposefully remove the cowbell. The fella who was after runny cheeses on his first visit may simply have been purchasing for someone else. Heck - he may hate runny cheeses. Or what happens if the husband of the lady interested in cheese history comes walking in wearing her cowbell. Our cheese salesman's going to feel pretty silly when he learns the person he addressed as 'madame' turns out to be a fella.

So yes, there are flaws in the cowbell technique. But, in my opinion, it's better to stumble on a person's name when greeting them again than to treat them as a complete stranger.

Home Page Design and the Blindfolded Cheese Salesman - tip #2

One trick our blindfolded cheese salesman can adopt is to put out a sample platter of his top cheeses. With plentiful samples, he really doesn't need to say a word. The cheese itself is all the introduction he needs.

Okay - so you can't hand a sample of cheese across the net, no matter what kind of bandwidth you have. And granted, not everyone is in a position where they can use the web to sample their wares. The home page as a sample platter works best when your trade is in thoughts and ideas as opposed to hard matter. But if you're in such a position that it is possible to show your worth directly, then why oh why wouldn't you?

New visitors should be funneled directly to your best and most popular material. Regular visitors should be presented with the most relevant and up to date material. The best advertisement for your service is your service. If you're an expert, send them to your best, expert advice. If you provide a web based service, slide them right into the service.

When you visit Flickr for the first time you're met with a very bright and colourful image and links that will instantly bring you to a dozen galleries. It's so very easy to slip off of the homepage and go skipping from image to image to image. When you visit the online comic PVP, the first thing you're hit with is the comic. No need to go hunting for the funny - it's right there on the home page, each and every day. The Wikipedia hits you with a number of interesting and relevant articles giving you an immediate sense of the breadth and depth of content contained within.

For the blindfolded cheese salesmen - tip #1

Okay. You're a blindfolded cheese salesman and you can hear someone approaching. What's your approach?

The fact of the matter is, if this is the first time this person's visiting, you really don't have a hope in heck of guessing the motivation behind their visit. The best thing you can do is engage them in a way that they want to tell you why they've come, and then quickly and seemlessly slip into the message that's tailored for them. Keep it simple. Keep it focused.

A home page should immediately encapsulate who and what you are. But keep it simple. Keep it focused.

Let's take Joe, our cheese salesman as an example. In the one example, Joe didn't properly explain the range of what he had to offer and lost out on selling a cheese grater to Fred. Likewise, Joe's sales focused message made the opening conversation difficult when the approaching person was a stakeholder - not a potential customer. But when Joe went the other way and just started rambling about every product and service, he became a cacophony of information, and frankly a little annoying.

Simplify.

Focus.

"Hi, my name's Joe. I'm your one-stop source for all information and products related to cheese."

See how nicely that meets with most anyone who approaches? It invites questions. It invites dialogue.

"I've got a question about your second quarter sales."
"Ah, a shareholder, of course. Let me direct you to that info."

"I'm looking for a cheese grater."
"Yes sir, if you'll just follow me to kitchenware, we've got exactly what you need."

Of course, this is assuming that your navigation is equally focused and simplified. If Joe's directs you to kitchenware, the path to kitchenware had better be self-obvious and intuitive. A single click away. This is extremely important - mind you - and the reason to make room in your web development budget for usability testing. Better for Joe if he's known as the guy who doesn't sell cheese graters as opposed to being known as the guy who makes it so friggin' frustrating and impossible to buy a cheese grater from.

Home Page Design and the Blindfolded Cheese Salesman

Seth Godin writes about the difficulties with home pages. In a previous post I mentioned that a homepage is like an introduction before launching in to a discussion. The simple pleasantries that are the beginning of any civilized conversation. A quick "Hi, my name's Joe and I'm a cheese salesman."

The problem - and the reason Seth can not find decent home pages - is that this introduction is done blindfolded. Someone approaches, but you have no idea who they are or why they've arrived until after the conversation has begun. They could be your oldest and most valued customer, or a prospective client, or your boss, or your mom. Until the conversation begins the only thing you know is someone is standing there.

The blindfold is not a problem for the small business owner or the site that caters to a very specific niche. You know that the people are approaching because they want something and want to know if you're the one to deliver it.

"Hi, my name's Joe and I'm a cheese salesman."
"Hey, that's great. I'm thinking of buying some Havartti"
"Oh, wonderful. We've an excellent Havartti assortment. Let me show you..."

The blindfold begins to become a problem when your range of products and services grow, or when you're suddenly confronted with more than one audience.

"Hi my name's Joe and I'm a cheese salesman. What type of cheese would you like today?"
"Um - I'm actually a shareholder. I just wanted to know how cheese sales went last quarter."
"Oh. uh. Yeah. We've got that. Hang on a second while I search for that info..."

"Hi my name's Joe and I'm a cheese salesman. What type of cheese would you like today?"
Fred who was looking for a cheese grater, not cheese, walks away. Not realizing that Joe also sells cheese graters.

"Hi my name's Joe and I'm a cheese salesman. What type of cheese would you like today?"
"Hi Joe - it's Sally."
"What type of cheese would you like today?"
"Um.. Joe. It's Sally."
"What type of cheese can I get you?"
"No Joe, it's Sally_Gruberman, password ********."
"Sally! Hi how are you? Did your mom like the cheese platter we sent last week? I've got an excellent article on pairing wine and cheese that I know you'll love."
"That's great Joe - thanks."

Most try to compensate for the blindfold by crying out everything and anything they have to offer, turning their home page into a cacaphony of information that would rival the busiest of street markets.

"Joe here - I've got havartti, gouda, chedder all kinds of cheeses! I have cheese plates, cheese knives and graters of every shape and size! Books about cheese! Want to know what wine goes with what cheese - we've got the answers! Listen up to Joe's cheese punditry! Wanna hear about cheese? Listen to the Joe's Cheese Podcast. All cheese all the time. Cheese news. We've got late breaking cheese news! Attention members of the cheese of the month club. New cheese available. Wanna join the cheese of the month club. Listen up for details..."

So what's a blindfolded cheese salesman to do?
I'll post a few ideas shortly, but please feel free to carry on the discussion - either in the comments or elsewhere.

Would the Conservative Party ban Harry Potter?

For those who've seen the new Harry Potter film, you'll recall there's a scene in which a flirtatious ghost joins young Harry in the tub, nuzzling up against his naked body.

Now if I'm understanding Canada's Criminal Code correctly, any depiction of sexual activity involving a person under the age of 18 is considered to be child pornography. To distribute, exhibit or even watch is an offense for which you could spend several years in prison. Now this lady ghost can frollic in the bath with young Mr. Potter, and we can all go and enjoy without fear of spending time in the big house, because a solid case can be made for the movie being a work with artistic merit. Likewise, Canadian video stores can rent Lolita, libraries can loan Robert Cormier's The Chocolate War, book stores can sell Stephen King's IT and any teenager is free to write privately or publicly about their desires or experiences - all because the works have demonstratable merit.

But the Conservative Party, as part of their platform, feel that the 'artistic merit' defense is a gaping loophole in the law that allows untold exploitation of children and peddling of filth. Put in a position of power, they would do away with the defense entirely.

During the 2004 election, I asked my local Conservative candidate about my concerns of censorship and state-enforced morallity. "I fear that resources that should be aimed at the filth who harm and photograph actual children will be misdirected towards artists and writers who have created 'fictional' accounts of sex with minors," I wrote in an email.

"The Conservative Party position is that there is no public good in child pornography and this loophole must go. This is not state enforced morality but a deliberate choice to put the interest of our most vulnerable citizens ahead of "artists" who can surely find other more productive subjects." was the response of the candidate in question.

So everyone, get your fix of Harry Potter now while you still can. Today it's an action filled, coming of age tale; tomorrow it's filth, filth, filth.

of nightmares and podcasts and media discussion

Further to the Nightmare Meme I posted earlier, there was some very interesting comments between Rob Irwin and Cameron Reilly regarding the future of the Mainstream Media in the face of citizen media.

I threw my two cents into the fray and plopped a post-it-note on the edge of my computer screen to remind myself to pop back over in a day or two to see how the discussion had evolved. But there was no need. Within a couple hours of my post, I recieved an email from Cameron telling me he's replied in his latest podcast. Give it a listen. Cameron makes some incredibly good points.

Damn. If I wasn't already convinced on the power of podcasting, this would have sold me. I've kibitzed in dozens of forums, blogs and discussion groups over the years but this ... this was different for me. Hearing Cameron's voice as he responded to my comment brought this discussion to a whole new level for me. Hearing the passion in Cameron's voice as he discussed this issue - that's something that just doesn't translate in the written word.

I've added G'Day World to my podcatcher, I suggest you do too.

As for my own response; Cameron, I don't disagree with what you have to say.

I do think we're on the cusp of a new revolution in terms of communication and open discussion. However I don't think the old media will be swept away so quickly. There are still far too many people who have no access to the internet, and more still who have the access but have no idea what that access means. My jaw almost completely unhinged earlier this week when I heard a business person opine that she couldn't see any benefit to being in the top position on a Google search. For these people the old models fulfill their needs.

As for the function, I personally, that the advertising model the mainstream media has been subsisting upon - interruptive messages delivered to as large an audience as possible - has been disfunctional for years. It's ineffective, delevers a poor return on investment and frankly, deserves to wither and die. However, there are still far too many companies who believe that marketing means advertising. There are too many businesses who still believe that they're just one slogan or jingle away from success. The perception remains that advertising is integral and so the dollars exist for any vehicle that proves significant.

Right now, and I imagine for the next couple decades - the significant numbers will remain with the traditional forms of media. But it's clear as glass as to where the future lies.

Mom Sued $2 Million for Website

A headline like that made for very tempting blogging fodder. Big bad corporation slaps down plucky mother who's trying to keep the neighbourhood safe for her kids. But I'm not one to take an article at face value. I wanted to learn a little more for myself.

The woman's website was down, due to heavy traffic, but the Google cache allows one to read her discourse sans photos. She may have some genuine complaints, but without the photos it's hard to tell how severe these infractions may be. But what becomes very clear is that this person definitely does not like the developers. So a couple of Google searches and the picture becomes a little clearer.

Louisette Lanteigne states "They call me an environmental activist, but I see myself as more of a mom who's just trying to be heard".

Given that Louisette's contact info is listed on an activist network, and that she is a leading member of a number of activist groups, I think the moniker of activist is fair. And while the story she tells the Canadian Press reporter is one of dangerous debris in the areas children are playing, what she's said in the past was "I want to make sure the forests are not destroyed before we have the chance to see what role they may play in our ecosystem and in the preservation of these birds."

Unfortunately, I was unable to locate any court documents related to this case online, and the articles are mostly focused on the 'David vs. Goliath' aspect of the story, giving only the barest of detail from the company's standpoint.

While it seems clear this is a case of a woman who is opposed to any development in that region and will do what she can to bring a halt to it, there is not enough info to determine if her words constitute liable.

The lawyer for the developer is confident that they will prevail in court and public opinion of the company will be undamaged as a result of their triumph in court. I have to disagree.

The story was originally one of 'environmentalism activist protests developer in defence of rare bird'. While her website may have been libelous, it was very much a local issue.

The story has been reframed as 'big business bullies a mother of three'. This is now a national news item and a global topic of discussion. A win in court will be viewed as 'big business buying a victory'. A loss would be a complete disaster from a PR standpoint.

Had the developer been content to just seek having the libelous material removed and a formal apology issued, they could have held the moral high-ground and continued to frame the story as 'plucky entrepreneurs face difficulties with fringe of the community'. Had they started a blog in which they detailed the inconsistencies and inaccuracies of Louisette's claims, they could have held the moral high-ground and saved several hundred dollars in lawyer's fees. They may have even garnered some positive press in the business trades. But by pulling out the big guns and demanding two million in damages for what appears to be a minor annoyance ... all moral high-ground is lost and the story has been framed so that, from a PR point of view, the developer can't win.

The lesson for today: never play an ace when a two will do.

Want dialogue marketing? Try listening.

November's Harvard Business Review contains an article touting the virtues of 'dialogue marketing' entitled 'The Perfect Message at the Perfect Moment'. From the article:

Turning a traditional marketing strategy into a dialogue marketing program is a straightforward matter. Begin by identifying the batch communications you make with customers, then ask yourself what events could trigger those communications to make them more timely. Add a question or call to action to each message and prepare a different treatment or response for each possible answer. Finally, create a series of increasingly urgent calls to action that kick in if the question or call to action goes unanswered by the customer.

The ability to reach a customer with a marketing message at particularly the moment they wish to hear that message is undoubtedly a goal to aim towards. Google's practice of pairing relevant, unobtrusive advertisements with the content of a search or website, being a billion dollar example of this strategy. I also agree that a well implemented customer database goes a long way towards improving customer service.

But there is something vitally important that is missing from what the HBR article calls 'dialogue marketing'. How about listening.

Without listening, all you have is a well staged monologue. A monologue is an improvement upon spouting random gibberish, however a monologue is no replacement for a dialogue. A monologue falls flat when unscripted questions are asked. Customer histories will never quite be complete as you're collecting only the information you thought was necessary. What you think is necessary and what actually is necessary are two very, very different things. Timed responses can very quickly become inappropriate and serve to drive a further wedge between the customer and corporation.

The article uses the example of an airline, in which a frequent flier who stops traveling for several months would flag an automated response in which a customer service rep calls to inquire what may be wrong. In this example, it was a poor customer service experience. Dependent upon the income demograph the customer falls into, either the customer is written off as not worth chasing or a letter of apology rubber stamped by an executive and affixed to some coupons is sent in an effort to win them back.

In my opinion, that's a crazed and ineffective system. Nothing has changed. Assuming your lucky enough to sway the customer back, how long will it be before the customer encounters the same issue that made them switch in the first place? What are your odds of winning them back a second time? A third? Unless you are in a position of a virtual monopoly, or surrounded by competition that are bumbling, incompetents, don't expect your monologue to be effective for long.

Who your customer is. What your customer needs to hear. When your customer needs to hear it. These are the key pillars to marketing. But the ground the pillars rest upon is 'What does your customer have to say?'.

The Worst Nightmare Meme

Carrying on Cameron Reilly's nightmare meme.

My name is Rob, but I've also used the net-name TragicLad.
I am 30, married and have a child.
I work at a professional association and run my own business.
I've got cash in the bank, a line of credit and a growing investment portfolio.
I ride public transportation, but have a license to drive.
I rarely watch TV - The West Wing, The Apprentice, The Daily Show and BattleStar Gallactica sums it up.
I only listen to the radio when I drive - perhaps an hour every other week.
I never buy a newspaper or magazine.
I read. A lot.
I do my banking online.
I buy my books and movies from Amazon.ca.
I visit a dozen webcomics or so each week - many I've subscribed to at ModernTales.com
My preferred news source is Google News.
My first stop for reference is Wikipedia.
I've started using Skype.
My browser is FireFox.
My documents are created in Open Office and my web pages authored on Notepad.
I'm using more and more open source software.
I don't own an IPod, but my wife's had several MP3 players from Creative.
I write a blog - you're reading it now.
I track over 350 professional's, executives, pundits, experts friends' and acquaintance's blogs using Google Reader. Daily.
I talk. A lot. A few people listen. Then they talk. A few people listen to them. Lots of us are talking. And listening. TO EACH OTHER.
I am becoming your worst nightmare. You know who you are.

Kansas paves the way for Pastafarians

What do you do when your interpreation of scripture doesn't mesh with reality? The Kansas State Board of Education came up with a novel solution. Redefine reality.

In a 6-4 vote, the Kanasas Board rewrote the definition of science so that it no longer requires 'natural explanations of phenomena'. This, of course, paves the way for science classes to teach about the Flying Spaghetti Monster and how his Noodly Appendage created the universe. Maybe it's time for me to revive the Church of the Devoured Cookie.

Child's Play

It was two years ago that Gabe, one of the creators of the popular gaming webcomic Penny Arcade wrote the following in his blog:

If you are like me, every time you see an article like this one [Violent video games are training children to kill], where the author claims that video games are training our nations youth to kill you get angry. The media seems intent on perpetuating the myth that gamers are ticking time bombs just waiting to go off. I know for a fact that gamers are good people. I have had the opportunity on multiple occasions to meet hundreds of you at conventions all over the country. We are just regular people who happen to love video games.

I understand Gabe's frustration. Lord knows, every fringe pasttime takes its slams from the media at one point or another. I've been a comic book reader, a Dungeons & Dragons roleplayer, a fan of horror flicks and a participant at sci-fi conventions. The mainstream media would paint me as a murderous deviant long before you factor in my video game playing. But instead of just grousing about it, Gabe stepped up and did something positive. Something that would change people's lives.

Wanting to show the world just what kind of people gamers are, he put out a request for donations of games and cash for the local children's hospital. "Let’s give these kids the Christmas that they deserve and let’s give the news papers a different kind of story to write about gamers," wrote Gabe.

And people responded. Boy did they ever. $250,000 worth was raised that first year. In 2004 the efforts expanded to assist a number of hospitals across the U.S. and close to a million was raised. What's more is that this Child's Play charity that's been created is all done strictly volunteer. Not a penny of overhead or administration. Every dollar finds its way to improving some hurt or sick kid's day.

Being sick when you're a kid stinks. Being sick during the holidays really really stinks. I'm glad to see that this year Child's Play has extended to include Canada and the Toronto Sick Kids' Hosptial. I've just made my donation and there's a copy of Charlotte's Web and a copy of Kingdom Hearts for the PS2 on its way to Sick Kids' to try and make things a little more bareable.